Page 35 - The Road from Babylon to Zion

further with God. Again, this did not seem to come to me as a threat, nor out of
anger, but as a statement of fact, and I sensed a desire from the Father that I would
pass this test as well.

Over the last number of years I have endured much as Father has led me down the
path He has had for me. Some things I suffered due to my own disobedience, such
as getting into financial debt, while many other things I suffered because I chose to
walk in obedience and truth. I have become an outcast on many levels: from my
church, from my family, from friends, from Christianity itself, and I have suffered
much misunderstanding and false judgment from others. I am not alone in this, for
I know many others have suffered these same things in recent days, as well as have
many saints down through the years, some of whose stories are recorded for our
benefit.

Father reminded me of Moses, who was a very meek man and who walked in
faithfulness before the Father. He shared an intimacy before God that no other man
of his day knew, and yet he was falsely judged as trying to be a lord over the people
and of directing people according to his own will, when in truth he was walking in
obedience to Yahweh’s will. The leaders of the Jewish people falsely accused him at
Korah’s rebellion, and at one time even his own brother and sister judged him
falsely.

Moses grew tired of all of the rebellion of the people, and their unbelief grieved him.
At times he felt so weighed down with the burden of the people that he gave way to
self-pity. One such moment is recorded in the following scripture.

Numbers 11:11-15
So Moses said to Yahweh, "Why hast Thou been so hard on Thy
servant? And why have I not found favor in Thy sight, that Thou hast
laid the burden of all this people on me? Was it I who conceived all this
people? Was it I who brought them forth, that Thou shouldest say to
me, 'Carry them in your bosom as a nurse carries a nursing infant, to
the land which Thou didst swear to their fathers'? Where am I to get
meat to give to all this people? For they weep before me, saying, 'Give
us meat that we may eat!' I alone am not able to carry all this people,
because it is too burdensome for me. So if Thou art going to deal thus
with me, please kill me at once, if I have found favor in Thy sight, and
do not let me see my wretchedness."

Yahweh never corrected Moses for this complaint, at least there is no record of any
such correction. This root of self-pity remained in Moses until it bore fruit in his life
and he struck the rock when he was commanded to speak to it. It is to be noted that
when Moses struck the rock that he chastised the people with his words, yet his anger