Page 17 - Push Back

Christians may wonder why there is such a strong push to make homosexual marriage legal if
there is so little fidelity among them. Certainly some of the interest is pecuniary, for with the
legalization of homosexual marriage will come various “family” benefits, such as health
insurance coverage, survivor benefits, and tax credits. Legalizing homosexual marriage will also
make it easier for homosexuals to adopt children. Relatively few homosexuals are interested in
marriage for the sake of fidelity to a partner. Dr. Nicolosi shares the following information.

In one recent study of gay male couples, 41.3% had open sexual agreements with some
conditions or restrictions, and 10% had open sexual agreements with no restrictions on sex with
outside partners. One-fifth of participants (21.9%) reported breaking their agreement in the
preceding 12 months, and 13.2% of the sample reported having unprotected anal intercourse in
the preceding three months with an outside partner of unknown or discordant HIV-status (1).

This study follows the classic research of McWhirter and Mattison, reported in The Male Couple
(1984), which found that not a single male pair was able to maintain fidelity in their relationship
for more than five years. Outside affairs, the researchers found, were not damaging to the
relationship’s endurance, but were in fact essential to it. “The single most important factor that
keeps couples together past the ten-year mark is the lack of possessiveness they feel,” says the
authors (p. 256)...

With the exception of the pioneering work of Warren (1974), for many years, little attention was
given to long term gay relationships. When McWhirter and Mattison published The Male Couple
in 1984, their study was undertaken to disprove the reputation that gay male relationships do not
last. The authors themselves were a homosexual couple, one a psychiatrist, the other a
psychologist. After much searching they were able to locate 156 male couples in relationships
that had lasted from 1 to 37 years. Two-thirds of the respondents had entered the relationship
with either the implicit or the explicit expectation of sexual fidelity.

The results of their study show that of those 156 couples, only seven had been able to maintain
sexual fidelity. Furthermore, of those seven couples, none had been together more than 5 years.
In other words, the researchers were unable to find a single male couple that was able to
maintain sexual fidelity for more than five years. They reported: