Page 52 - Evidence of Things Unseen

praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Yahshua the Messiah...

The Lord was to subject me to a more intense trial this time, that my faith might be
purified further by the fire it was subjected to. As the date approached where I could cancel
my health insurance, but was still a couple months away, I began to experience the
symptoms of diabetes. I had constant thirst and frequent urination. My mouth felt dry and
cottony, and at times I experienced blurred vision and even dizziness. These symptoms
persisted and began to increase in their frequency and intensity.
One day while I was performing my job as the hospital’s personal computer manager,
I was working on a system in the ER when I became very dizzy. I was forced to lean against
a wall to keep from falling down. Since I was already in the emergency room, I thought that
I had better get myself checked out to see what the problem was. Blood tests were run and
they revealed that my blood sugar level was 370 when it should be no higher than 120. The
ER doctor told me that I was diabetic and that I needed to go see a family physician and get
started on a diabetic regimen.
It was now less than a month before the date when I could cancel my health insurance.
I considered this matter, and it struck me as more than coincidental that I should
experience this trial at this time. Yet, God allowed me to be tried further. Certain nurses,
whom I knew at the hospital, who worked with diabetic patients, and were involved in
diabetic education, had heard about my diagnosis. They began seeking me out and urging
me to go see a doctor immediately. They told me horror stories of patients who had gone
blind from this disease, and others who experienced organ failure and amputated limbs.
They would place brochures in my hands that proclaimed this same fearful message. These
nurses told me that they had patients in the hospital at that very moment whose blood
sugar level was no higher than mine, and they were on intravenous insulin drips.
When my wife learned of my condition she was no longer desirous of canceling our
health insurance. It seemed that on every front I was meeting resistance to this
commitment I had made before the Lord. My symptoms persisted. I was accustomed to
sleeping through the night without getting up a single time, but now I was getting up five
or six times a night due to my frequent need to urinate, and I would then guzzle more water
to slake my thirst. I was becoming somewhat rattled in my trial, and one day while driving
with my family I pulled out in front of an oncoming car that I did not see. I only avoided a
collision when my wife screamed, leading me to slam on the brakes. It may have been partly
due to diabetes’ negative effect on peripheral vision that I did not see the car, but it was also
partially due to my own anxious state.
I spent much time thinking about this matter of trusting God for our health, and I held
off from going to see a family physician. Despite all the negative pressure I was receiving,
and the report of my senses, I still had a witness in the spirit that God wanted me to trust
Him and cancel health insurance on our family.
As I considered it, I could go to a doctor and begin treatment for diabetes, a treatment
I would most likely be on for the rest of my life, or I could cast myself wholly over onto the
Lord and trust Him to bring complete healing. The prospects of being healed, when
compared to lifelong diabetic management, knowing that there is no medical cure for
diabetes and the condition usually worsens with age, caused me to prefer entrusting myself
to God with anticipation of complete healing.
Perhaps the greatest factor that weighed in my choice to trust God was that I
considered what life would be like if God could not be trusted. I considered what the years